The Filing Cabinet

I made a huge mistake!

I listened to my husband. smile emotic

Here's how it all went down:

Back in September I discovered this gorgeous filing cabinet – See the pretty picture here.

I fell instantly in love.

I know. I know.

But, yes, with a filing cabinet.

But look at it. Have you ever seen anything so gorgeous.

And it locks so I can keep my client files in it.

I posted about it, I dreamed about it, and, yup, I maaaaay have drooled over it a bit.
In September.

And I decided that on my next big month (10K+ at the time) it would be mine. Even though, or maybe especially, because it had a price tag of over $1000.

Yes, for a filing cabinet.

And, wouldn't y'know, September ended up being a $10K month. Yay!

And then I told my husband about it.

And I got 'the look'. The look that says, 'I think maybe you've lost your ever-lovin' mind.'

And my heart fell.

And I realized I was being selfish.

And I realized, with all the guilt that it entails, that I didn't in any way *deserve* a $1400 filing cabinet.

No matter how much it thrilled my heart.

So I let it go. I moved on. I was 'practical'.

Yeah, right.

What actually happened was that I didn't make a sale in the last 3 months of the year.

Not a single freakin' one.

Not. One.

I still had money coming in from my accounts receivable so the bills were paid, but my business was stagnant and I made up all sorts of excuses about needing to re-calibrate or needing the rest or needing blah blah blah.

The truth is that what I needed was to respect the call of my heart and not listen to the voices that tell me I don't deserve it, no matter who they belong to or how loud they are.

So, right here, right now, I do declare that I am going to get myself that filing cabinet to celebrate my next big month ($15K+) and I am going to love using it every damn day and I DO deserve more than IKEA furniture and I WILL fill my house with beauty and I WILL do that regardless of what limiting beliefs and fears my husband (or anyone else!) reflects back to me.

Signed, Me. 

PS Just to be clear: normally my husband is uber-supportive and loves the sh*t out of me and agrees to all of my plans and schemes. This wasn't about him.

This was ALL about me and my limiting beliefs about my deservedness. He just showed me what was in me that needed to be transformed.

Husbands are good that way.


Vanessa Long

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